The Corey Feldman-hosted orgies of your dreams will never live up to their nightmarish realities.
Since the release of his terrifying music video (see above), "Ascension Millennium," the former Goonie hasn't had the best summer. First Vice confirmed that his birthday party was the most depressing and disturbing Los Angeles event of the year. Then Defamer came out with a first-hand account from a drug-fueled sex party at his home.
Lila Whitney gave Defamer a description of what said party looked like. It wasn't pretty.
The party reminds me of that episode of Saved by the Bell where a fictitious celebrity comes to Bayside High to film an anti-drug PSA, and then offers Kelly some weed. Only, the drug is ecstasy, not marijuana. And everyone is naked.
Things got really depressing really fast.
Suddenly, Corey stops f**king the hot blonde and tells her to change the song on the CD. Bewildered by the request, and the circumstances, I start to listen to the music. It sounds vaguely familiar. I realize Corey has requested to hear his own CD. He’s having an orgy and listening to himself sing at the same time.
Both accounts -- his birthday bonanza and this undated orgy -- give us reason to believe that the Corey Feldman comeback tour will probably never happen. We're not even sure if we want it to.
Click over to Vice to see some truly horrifying and NSFW photos of Feldman's birthday party and to Defamer for the entire story of the Corey Feldman-hosted orgy. Once you see, you will never unsee.