05/29/2009 05:12 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

The Human-TelePrompter Hybridization Of Barack Obama Is Complete

If you had the strange feeling that a nation of Obama critics all experienced an orgiastic convulsion all at once Tuesday morning, this screengrab explains why. Pictured below is FBI director Robert Mueller, preparing to introduce President Barack Obama. Obama has been repeatedly criticized for being the first person in the world to dare show weakness to the terrorists by using a TelePrompter during speeches. I mean, how dare he attempt to organize words and thoughts for a speech, with socialism. Real Americans, like Richard Burr, speak incoherently, if they speak at all, unless they are talking about fomenting a needless financial panic by telling their constituents to withdraw all their money from banks.

As you can see, the truth was far more insidious! Obama has become a TelePrompter! Ha, ha, delicious! This will be the only thing the bloggers at the National Review Online will talk about for the next seventeen hours.

Obviously, this is a Constitutional crisis.

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AP's Ron Fournier Concerned By Obama's Teleprompter "Crutch"