I Am A Republican. I Am A Christian. And I Won't Vote For Trump

I Am A Republican. I Am A Christian. And I Won't Vote For Trump
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Carlo Allegri / Reuters

I will always remember the first time I went to Washington, D.C.

I was a college student. In my senior year of studying English Literature. The semester before I had participated in the GOP Get Out the Vote (or GOTV) 96 hour push for Bush/Cheney ‘04 in Denver. It was 4 days of little sleep, lots of pizza, Starbucks runs galore, and constant door-knocking, canvasing, and phone calls.

It was exhilarating. It was like a sports game but with long lasting and life changing results. I believed in the candidates I was stumping for... I truly felt like they were going to make the world a better place. And I was helping in that fight.

All of us students were crammed in a bus on election night and already driving back to school in Oklahoma when they called it for Bush. I remember reading the news on my phone and falling asleep in a happy exhaustion. I felt honored that I had the smallest part in working towards that victory.

And from that moment on I was hooked. I believed in the American political system. So much so that I last minute added on Government as a double major to my degree (meaning I had to stay an extra 2 semesters in school), I became a Teachers Assistant in Government 101 classes, I lead debates among the other students, and I signed up for a Government Student Symposium in Washington, D.C.

As my plane was descending to the DCA airport, the clouds broke just as we were flying over the Pentagon. It was like a beacon of light. I know that sounds cheesy but it’s true. It was like seeing the foundation and history of our country, in physical form, was breathtaking to me.

We sat for 3 days in the Cannon House Office Building as Congressman after Congressman, Senator after Senator, Officer after Officer, came in and talked to us about government, our place in the process, and how we can help build America.

Because, at the end of the day, this is what government is all about. America. The people of America. The human hearts, emotions and spirits of America. It was about helping, giving, backing, supporting and leading each and every life that was inside these borders. And to me that is a very beautiful, special and sacred thing.

I graduated with my political degree and married a political consultant. We have traveled across the country for political candidates, we have moved from place to place for political candidates, we have struggled and suffered and had joys with and for political candidates... because we believed in them. And what they were doing for these American people.

So when Trump first appeared on the stage a year ago, it was with some shock and a bit of a laugh... I think most people didn’t expect him to last this long, let alone become the nominee, and frankly, so did we. A flash in the pan really.

As he continued his campaign, his remarks began to startle me. Because it sounded like separation and division versus unification. It sounded like belittling, mocking and flat out being cruel to American lives versus understanding, encouraging or even being nice. It sounded like it was more important to be self-exalting versus humility or dignity.

As a Republican, I didn’t recognize the conservative values. And as a Christian, I didn’t recognize the compassion Jesus taught us to give.

And yet people were following along and agreeing. Republicans. Christians. Social Conservatives. They were all hopping aboard the Trump Train.

I have tried and tried to understand it all but I don’t. I cannot believe that a candidate who cannot outright denounce Planned Parenthood, be slow to denounce the KKK, tweet horrible name calling and disparaging remarks to everyone who remotely stood up to him (Republican and Democrat alike), can be completely tolerated and even accepted.

I’ve seen my Christian friends calling non-Trump supporters names. Threatening them. Publicly shaming them. And I wonder how is this okay? If you are a Christian, and a Republican, who believes in the compassion and love of Christ, how is this okay?

The Bible says, “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse” (Romans 12:14). I don’t see this in many Christian Trump supporters. And honestly, it is breaking my heart.

I hope I will always be that same girl who flew into Washington, D.C in college days and be proud of the history of our country and the political system but for now I will say this...

I am a Republican. I am a Christian. And I will not be voting for Donald Trump this fall. I will teach my kids that while I love the Republican party, that convictions, choosing right over wrong, and being nice is more important than party lines.

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