Rich white guys just can't get a fair shake these days. Case in point: Mitt Romney.
Remember Mitt Romney? He's the well-coiffed, policy-challenged Republican who lost to Barack Obama in the 2012 election.
Romney lost the election for a variety of reasons. First, he has no personality. Second, he has no personality. Third, he managed to piss off a large percentage of the electorate -- 47 percent of the electorate, to be exact -- by suggesting they're too lazy to get a job and pay their taxes.
Did I mention that he also has no personality?
All of this, plus the fact that Romney's policies just didn't match his numbers, are a good reason why Barack Obama is now serving a second term in Washington, and Mitt Romney is pumping his own gas and squeezing out grandkids in La Jolla, California.
But in case you thought it was Mitt Romney's fault that he lost the election, Ann Romney has a different take. The wife of Mitt Romney says it wasn't her husband's fault that he lost the race. Ann Romney says it's the media's fault -- and Barack Obama's fault!
In an interview with Chris Wallace on Fox News Sunday, Ann Romney said her husband lost the race because the media didn't give him a "fair shake." Complaining that the voters "didn't get to know Mitt for who he was," Mrs. Mitt Romney blamed the media and the Obama campaign for portraying her husband in a negative light.
"I think that any time you're running for office, you always think that you're being portrayed unfairly," Ann Romney told Wallace. "Of course on our side, [we] believe there is more bias in favor of the other side. I think that's a pretty universally felt opinion."
First, I have to credit Chris Wallace for even putting Ann and Mitt Romney on the air. Like many Americans, I had forgotten that the Romneys' opinion still matters. Then Chris Wallace gave them 30-plus minutes on Fox News to air their grievances against the media, Obama, and anybody else who, in their opinion, was in the bag for the president. Thank you, Chris Wallace! Without you and Fox News, I never would have known that Republicans still think it's everybody else's fault that they lost in 2012.
Forget about the fact that Mitt Romney has no personality. Forget about the fact that he alienated 47 percent of the electorate. Forget about the fact that Mitt Romney's policies didn't match his numbers when it came to national defense, deficit reduction, or the economy. To hear Ann Romney tell it, Million Dollar Mitt would be president today... if he could just get a fair shake!
Because, as we all know, you can't win an election without getting a fair shake from the media. Nobody has ever won an election without getting a fair shake from the media! Certainly not Barack Hussein Obama, the Nazi from Indonesia who wants to kill your grandmother, steal your guns, convert you to Islam, destroy capitalism, butcher your unborn babies, suspend the 22nd Amendment, run for a 3rd term, and do it all over again. He was never portrayed in a negative light by anyone. That's why he won in 2012. Right, Ann Romney?
And forget about George W. Bush, the draft dodger who went AWOL during Vietnam but still managed to win two terms in the White House. It must have been the fair shake he got from Dan Rather that put him in the White House.
What about Bill Clinton? Surely it was all those rumors that he killed Vince Foster that won him the White House. Remember, you can't win the White House if you don't get a fair shake from the media.
When, oh when, will Ann Romney, Mitt Romney, and the rest of the GOP admit that they lost in 2012 because they had a bad candidate who just couldn't score the votes he needed to win? Probably never. In the meantime, they'll blame the media, the Obama campaign, government handouts, welfare queen, and anybody else for losing the election for them. They'll insist it was everybody else's fault -- not theirs -- that Mitt Romney lost in 2012. And they'll expect us to believe it.
Because remember, rich white guys just can't get a fair shake these days.