Newsweek, the struggling current events magazine, has merged with the website Cats That Look Like Hitler to form a new media entity called "Cats That Look Like Hitler Just Merged With Newsweek, Inc."
Newsweek spokesperson Emilia Reoldt said, "This merger brings together the perfect combination of proven, impeccable journalistic standards and cats who bear a striking resemblance to the late Nazi leader, Adolf Hitler." Rumors of the merger had begun several days ago, but talks between the two sides stalled when several Cats That Look Like Hitler representatives retreated under a bed and refused to emerge.
Newsweek editor Clarence Seffer notes that the editorial content of the magazine will remain mostly unchanged, with more of a focus on how domestic and international issues directly affect cats who look like Hitler and other Fascist dictators. Cats That Look Like Hitler spokesperson Meow Tse-tung had no comment on the merger and, instead, happily played with a tiny rubber mouse with a bell inside it.