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Quo Vadis Goldman Without Expletives!?

Jul 29, 2010 | Updated May 25, 2011

If understood correctly Goldman finally has a truly serious situation on its hands. A memo from above has just been circulated to Goldman's traders that henceforth no expletives are to be used in describing financial junk or otherwise in the text of 'in house' emails. Now we all remember Senator Levin holding up copy of a Goldman-formulated email describing a Goldman fabricated financial instrument as sh..., sorry, I can't say it, but you know what I mean.

Now the dilemma is, without proper clarity, without language and argot that clearly defines what they have brewed in the way of financial engineering for the less wary to gobble up (you know, those who didn't go to MIT or the Harvard Business School) at pension funds or soft overseas marks, how will they communicate to their trading desks to aggressively short (remember derivatives, CDS's and on) those very instruments? How can they now make a double bonanza, first by pocketing commissions selling the sh... (still can't say it) and then betting or having their favored clients bet against them?

This is a big problem. Hank Paulson, where are you when we need you again?