Stop everything and listen up: You can now purchase a Mario Kart to love and cherish and keep for your very own. The cart is identical to the model Mario and company ride in Nintendo's hit game of the same name. (Banana peels and red shells not included.)
This means you won't have to resort to using your homemade Kart anymore. The only drawback is that the official Mario Kart vehicle is made for children. But, we've been looking at the pictures, and we're pretty sure we could make ourselves fit. They might have to use the Jaws of Life to get us out again, but it'd be totally worth it.
This is the happiest kid alive.
The product listing says the Mario Kart can travel up to 2.5 mph. You're probably not going to get it off any sick jumps, but at least those who try to taunt you for riding a kid's toy will have to work up to a light jog to keep up with you.
The vehicle also includes sound effects from the game, on- and off-road tires, brakes and a seatbelt.
But who says you have to drive it anywhere? We're already envisioning ourselves tucked into that little plastic seat, parked in front of the TV, playing "Mario Kart 8" when it comes out in May. Isn't it a beautiful sight? (Stop thinking about how uncomfortable it would be. You're ruining it.)
You can order it right now for $199 from Toys R' Us.