For those of us who view politics as sport, yesterday's primary results promise that there's no end in sight to this game, at least not any time soon. Ten states cast ballots for their Republican favorite, and the conclusion at the end of the day: there is no favorite.
Yes, I know that technically Romney won the most states and delegates, but the fact that Santorum and Gingrich (so sorry, Ron Paul) would not concede is a telling sign that their respective wins carry with them the hope of an upset someway, somehow at the Republican convention. So they are keeping hope alive -- a phrase I'm sure they'd rather I'd be using to talk about our president. But nonetheless, they are feeling the optimistic pangs of small victories.
Romney, on the other hand, lives to fight another day, and fight he must, because, take it from a northerner who lived in the south for fourteen years, a Massachusetts Mormon will not win southern evangelical states and it is doubtful he can win the presidency without at least some of those southern states. And this poses quite the conundrum, because Romney is still winning the delegate count.
Sure, Romney won his home state of Massachusetts as well as neighboring Vermont. Are there even any Republicans in Vermont? So how can Romney win the nomination? Mitt, if you're reading this, as I'm sure you are, here's my suggestion: take a page from Speaker Boehner -- cry. Give the good folks at home some evidence that there's an honest to goodness heart beating in there somewhere, because to those of us watching you on TV, you seem cold, disconnected and completely unrelatable, and those are not the qualities that will win you votes against the guy who saved the auto industry and can sing really well.
Rick Santorum, the man who single-handedly brought back the sweater vest, to you I say: what did women ever do to you that you hate us so much? Come on, Rick. I don't believe you can earnestly spew that much venom against your Republican counterparts and the current President of the United States, not to mention an entire gender whose sole purpose you seem to view as being vessels for procreation, even if that procreation happens as a result of rape, and then convince us that you're taking the high ground. You can't tell us that we, as a country, should never apologize to anyone for anything and then say you believe in a religion predicated on original sin. Seriously?
To Newt, bless his heart: three wives, two religions, and one moon colony later, I'm not sure "tortoise" is the choice I would have gone with to describe myself, but okay, tortoise it is. Best of luck to you.
It is true that we are living in a time of unprecedented divisive rhetoric, but I believe it is possible to allow for those with more radically conservative beliefs to live their lives as they see fit without imposing those limiting beliefs on my life. You don't have to marry someone of the same gender or use birth control. Just quit telling the rest of us that we can't. Live and let live.
As we watch and wait to see how this political season plays out, I'd like to pay homage to a great talent we lost yesterday, Robert Sherman, who penned, among other classics, "It's a Small World." As we tally up the wins and losses, it is my fervent hope that we would one day realize "there's so much that we share that it's time we're aware it's a small world after all." It really is, you know. If only we could act like it now.